One of my favorite parts of camping is sitting by the camp fire, simply enjoying creation (and making s'mores isn't bad either!) As I was doing just that, God's voice began to stir in my heart. He showed me the fire in front of me and spoke words of life and truth to my soul.
As I watched the fire come to life, I realized a few things. To start a fire, it takes a lot of paper. And the paper burns quickly-- it cannot be sustained by just paper for long, small sticks must be added, and then larger pieces of wood, and finally logs can be placed on the fire, and it will burn steadily and slowly. And after all of that is gone, embers remain. Hot coals are still present under the surface, and in fact, can be fanned into flame once again.
Through all of this God was reminding me of what it looks like to walk with Him. Often times that initial moment of salvation, when we accept God's grace and begin living for Him is epic and dramatic. It is an emotional high that we often expect to continue. Its like the paper that starts the fire-- awesome, and needed, but not something that can be sustained for long periods of time. As we grow and mature in our walk with Jesus, we move from always needing to experience that emotional high, to simply being able to burn steadily for Him, day in and day out. We stop expecting Him to work for and serve our every emotional whim, and begin to realize that its a lot more like a relationship. A lot more like a steady, unceasing devotion to Him. We become like the logs. Sometimes there are flare ups in the 'fire' that is our lives, but mostly, its just a steady burn. And that lasts. And that is how it should be.
God also brought Isaiah 42:3 to mind-- "A bruised reed He will not break and a smoldering wick He will not snuff out." Appropriate, right? This is a verse of hope. To me it speaks of God's faithfulness, patience and enduring love for His children. It reminded me that God sees even the tiniest glimmer of hope. He sees the 'embers' under the surface, and that is enough to fan into flame a fire once again.
The point is: our lives with Christ were never meant to be a continual series of emotional highs to sustain us. It was meant to be a relationship. And relationship involves both highs and lows. Both are important for character transformation. Both are needed. Its a steady burn. And in the moments we feel faint. Weary. Drained. Fatigued. Doubting. The embers remain. He has not given up. He will not snuff out a smoldering wick. His faithfulness continues through all generations.
So, I step out with wobbly knees, and a trembling, fatigued heart, and I remember that it is the slow burn that sustains. I remember that in the moments when I feel faint, God is working on the embers in my heart, drawing me close to Him once again.
And my heart can be at rest.
