Life seems to go like that sometimes - everything hits at once and it can be disorienting and devastating. And all this while Covid and social distancing continues to rage.
This past week in my community there has been a miscarriage, unexpected death of a child, and a covid diagnosis. I found out that another in my circle's marriage is ending due to infidelity and there have been multiple shootings, at a school, an airport and a FedEx plant.
Outside of that, I know an individual that has been in the job hunt for some time now, still looking. Fractured friendships and the daily stress of keeping house, job, chores, rest... It's exhausting.
I've seen a greater level of jaded hearts and spirits during this past year... even those that are close to me or have a solid foundation have struggled with keeping an encouraging outlook. I get it, honestly, it's been a crappy year for many and the reality of covid stress just makes the hardships and tragedies that much more painful.
The political, racial and social unrest in the United States has been off the charts and it can be nauseating to keep up with it all.
2020 did not go as any of us expected, and 2021 is not looking too much different... Sigh. It's enough to make one sick. Or curl up and hide. Or cry big, deep, cleansing tears... maybe a combination of all three...
What do we do when the world falls apart?
What do we do when it seems like everywhere we turn there is pain and hurt and devastating loss?
What do we do?
I wish I could wrap my arms around these situations, pick them up and throw them in the ocean, never to be seen or thought of again. And of course, I can't.
I don't have all the answers (not even close) and honestly, I find myself feeling helpless and questioning what can I do more often than I'd like.
But I have learned a few things through grief, tragedy, sorrow and pain...
I've learned to adjust expectations of myself and my community. I allow more time to get ready in the morning, knowing my brain needs to process and that may make me move more slowly. I don't put as much pressure on myself to be as productive through the day because I realize that body, soul and spirit are intertwined and rest is needed for all three.
I've learned to reach out to others. These days it may look like a phone or video chat, or it may be in person. Reaching out is the key. I've realized that no one can fix the broken hearts that come as a side effect of tragedy, but it is healing to have a listening ear, a friend or family member to just allow that natural process to happen as they sit with me through it.
I've learned to get outside. I've been in my own house a lot this past year, with primarily working from home this past year. I sit with my own thoughts, by myself all day long and sometimes that can bring discouragement. Getting outside for a walk, even making work phone calls from the back deck or just breathing extra deep as I walk across the street to check the mail have been cleansing for my body physically and emotionally.
I've learned that this world is not my final destination. When I think about what life would look like without the understanding of a perfect and glorious eternity ahead, I can understand the hopelessness that seems to permeate our world. This world is marred by sin, tragedy and pain. Thankfully, in eternity with God, there is wholeness, healing and relationship. What a comforting truth - this is truly not the best it gets for those that trust in Him.
You wanna know something else?
The one who is dealing with infidelity beamed with gratitude for how helpful her friends have been in making sure her and her kids had a place to live, and furniture in her home. She told me how God has been there for her every step and how this year, even though she's watched Satan wreak havoc all over, she has been closer to God than ever.
The one that had the miscarriage told me that they're resting and recovering.
The ones who lost a child are not alone, and have a rich community of friends and family around them.
While these truths don't fix the tragedies, they do provide a glimpse into the goodness that still exists in our (broken & sinful) world. I could be here all day sharing about the good work and amazing miracles that have taken place in this past year.
One of the best depictions of the nuance of emotion I've seen portrayed in the media is through the 2015 animated movie "Inside Out". This gives a refreshing look at the richness that comes when emotions can exist simultaneously... happiness and sadness in the same memory. Anger and disgust at the same thought. It's part of what makes us wholehearted humans, and image bearers of our Father in heaven.
I have told you these things that you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.
- Jesus' words in John 16:33
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